The Man in Your Heart
by Valtiatar
Summary: Sequel to The Man in Your Bed. Some darker coulds are appearing to the horizon. How will they handle it? Beefman returns!


**Sequel to **_**The Man in Your Bed**_**. Read that first. Enjoy!**

**~Val**

The Man in Your Heart

Miroku paced around his apartment feeling confused, irritated and many other things he did not want in the name of modesty give a name to. His problem, once again, was Sesshoumaru, that beef bastard. He had not called. He had promised to call that evening because their dinner plans had gone to fishes (he had work to do…).He promised to call!

The clock in his kitchen told him that it was already midnight, and his phone told him that there were no missed calls. How many times had Sesshoumaru done this? He arranged time so they could meet and then he would cancel in the last minute. This time Miroku had cooked and now all the food was going to garbage because _he _was not coming and Miroku himself was way too angry to even think about eating.

Miroku sighed and slumped to his couch. He had known there would going to be trouble. Their so called "relationship" started too quickly and unexpectedly. Miroku could only blame himself for that. He had practically dragged Sesshoumaru home with him and assured him he was already over Inuyasha. Of course Sesshoumaru would have doubts about it too. Especially when Inuyasha and Miroku were such good friends.

That still did not explain why he had not called! Okay, they had had sex and they started to go out only after meeting…what, like…twice, or something. Oh god… Miroku hit his head to the pillow and lied there on the sofa for awhile. Now that he really thought about it, it was not such a good start after all, even though it had felt good at the time it had happened. Their first meeting had been because Miroku had tried to sleep with him while completely drunk and thinking he was Inuyasha. Second time had not been much better. After interrupting Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha's quarrel some weeks later they had ended up having drinks and then sleeping together. It was quite a long time line but only few times meeting…

They had met many times after that, naturally, since they were dating. Those times were hard to come by though. Sesshoumaru was as bad workaholic as one can be, so he usually put his work before Miroku. Like how he did now. Miroku could only hope that his work was very important. If it was not, how could the bastard leave him waiting!

Suddenly Miroku's phone rang. He jumped up from the couch and rushed to answer the phone. He completely forgot he was angry. He just wanted to hear _his_ voice. "Hello? Are you there? I've been waiting for ages!"

"Why?" Inuyasha's voice answered. Miroku had to bit his lip so he would not groan in disappointment. His heart clenched uncomfortably. It was the first time he did not want to have Inuyasha calling to him.

"Oh, it's you. Nothing, I thought it would be somebody else. What's up?" he tried very hard to keep his voice cheerful.

" Come over. Kagome is freaking out and I don't know what to do with her."

"You're not serious, right?"

"Would I call because of something this embarrassing if I weren't!?! You need to come. You have that gay-vibe that sooths her."

Miroku rolled his eyes. After learning about Miroku and Sesshoumaru's relationship Inuyasha had managed to mention Miroku being gay in EVERY single conversation they had. It was getting annoying… "Just say what the problem is so I can figure out if I can do anything. If you haven't noticed, it's late. I don't want to go outside if I don't have to."

"You'll see when you get here", Inuyasha snapped and hung up.

Miroku sighed. It was so like Inuyasha. Apparently it was something embarrassing, or more like Inuyasha honestly did not know what to do. He would never ask help like that if he had a choice.

He looked at the clock again. Yep, it really did look like Sesshoumaru was not going to come. Or call. He could just as well go to see Inuyasha and Kagome. At least it was better that sulking in bed without any sleep for the rest of the night.

Miroku grabbed his coat and stepped outside. It did not take long until he was on his friend's doorstep knocking the door. To his great surprise the one opening the door was Kagome. She did not look frantic at all. Quite the contrary, she smiled very sweetly. "Oh, Miroku! What a surprise. Come in. Has something happened? You don't normally come at this hour and you look rather pale."

"No, no. That's something I should ask. Inuyasha called and told me you were mad because of something."

Kagome looked puzzled. "Really?" Then her face suddenly turned dark. "I should have know… INUYASHA!!!!"

Miroku was amazed how quickly Inuyasha responded. When he saw Miroku standing behind Kagome, he looked a bit sheepish and bowed his head slightly like a schoolboy who is going to be in big trouble. That was probably a very wise reaction, since Kagome was obviously furious. "How could you Inuyasha?"

"What is going on?" Miroku asked confused.

"This idiot just doesn't get it into his stupid head that you and Sesshoumaru are a couple! Why can't you leave them be? Do you have to try messing their relationship?" Kagome screamed to Inuyasha.

The words "couple" and "relationship" rang in Miroku's head making him blush, something he very rarely did. Thinking about Sesshoumaru as something that belonged to him was quite a pleasant thought. "How cold Inuyasha try ruining our…relationship?" he asked rather skeptically. It was hard to get that last word out of his mouth.

"You told us you two have a date tonight, right?" Kagome started to explain. "Inuyasha's been freaking out all day. I'm sorry Miroku, I should have been more careful with him."

"No no, it's okay Kagome. Nothing really happened. Sesshoumaru wasn't going to come anyways. I'll just go home now."

Kagome nodded looking a bit guilty. Miroku could not understand why, it was not her fault if Inuyasha had a personality problem. Speaking of which, his white haired friend looked way too pleased when Kagome was not looking at him. For some reason cold shivers ran down Miroku's spine.

He really wanted to go home as quickly as he possibly could. It had not been a good day. He said quick goodnights to Inuyasha and Kagome and opened the front door, just to get a heart attack.

Sesshoumaru was standing outside. He looked like he had been running; his hair was a bit messy and his breathing heavy. But what really gave Miroku a shock was his eyes. They were so cold. He looked directly at Miroku without even blinking. His mouth was a tight line and Miroku knew something was terribly wrong.

"So you did come here" Sesshoumaru whispered his voice low.

Miroku's insides turned cold. "Uh, yes. I did. Well, you weren't coming and then Inuyasha called – "

"And you came running to his side", Sesshoumaru cut him off.

"What are _you_ doing here?"

"Looking for you. I finished my work as quickly as I could so I could come to you. But, you weren't there."

"I thought you weren't going to come at all!"

"…"

"Why are you like this?" Miroku was getting a little scared. Sesshoumaru had never behaved like this before. Just looking at him made Miroku's heart clench. He looked so mad and somehow very hurt.

"You still haven't gotten over him, have you?" Sesshoumaru stated and turned his eyes away. He could not even look at Miroku.

"What are you talking about?"

"You always talk about him and you always come here running if you get even a hint you might be needed."

"Of course! It's my friend we are talking about and – "

"No!" Sesshoumaru's voice rose. "It's not! We are talking about someone you have been in love with for ages! I knew you weren't over him. It was so obvious. How could you be? I never should have…" his voice faded away.

"You never should have what?" Miroku asked horrified. This could not be happening.

Sesshoumaru did not answer. There was a moment of silence and that silence was so thick it was getting harder and harder to breath. Miroku could not find the courage to break the silence. Something was broken, and he was afraid it would all just fall to pieces.

"Just tell me one thing…" Sesshoumaru's beautiful voice finally spoke. Miroku had never heard him sound like that. It was somehow fragile. The usual calmness and confidence was gone. He turned his amber eyes to look directly at Miroku. The sheer intense power of the eyes made Miroku bite his lip. "Was I just a replacement?"

Miroku gasped. How could he say something like that? So cruel. He could not speak. He knew he had to. He was losing Sesshoumaru. He had to say something. Make him stay. He had to do _something_!!

But he could not. He had frozen to his place unable to move or speak. With wide eyes he stared at Sesshoumaru and tried to force his head to function again. Sesshoumaru's words had taken him by surprise. Now he doubted even himself. Could he really have done something so horrible? Was Sesshoumaru just a replacement? Did he still harbor feelings towards Inuyasha?

Unfortunately his head did not work as fast as it should have. Sesshoumaru's eyes were filled with sadness. His fists were so tightly closed his knuckles were white. "I'll take that as a yes", he muttered. "See Inuyasha?" he said louder, "You got what you wanted."

And then he was gone.

It was so fast.

Miroku's knees failed him and he fell to the ground. Vaguely he realized that Kagome was beside him, trying to get him standing. Everything swirled around him. He could not focus.

Next thing he realized about his surroundings was that he was sitting on a couch holding a cup of tea. That was not right. He looked at the cup like it had done something very bad to him. Suddenly someone grabbed the cup and took it replacing it with a glass. Miroku smiled weakly and gulped it all down. Thank god it wasn't water! The vodka burned his throat, but at least he got some of his reasoning back.

"How do you feel?" Kagome's voice reached his ears.

"What do you think?"

"Sorry. Stupid question. Do you want more?"

"Yes please." Miroku sighed holding out his class. "So you heard all of it…"

"Yeah."

"I'm sorry, Kagome."

"About what?"

"Well, that whole scene, of course. And that you had to hear about it that way."

"Your break up?"

Miroku looked at Kagome. Was that woman a little slow? "No… My feelings for Inuyasha."

"Oh! That! But I knew already."

"Huh?"

"Yes, well, I realized it when we had the engagement party."

"Ah. Yeah, I was behaving quite oddly back then, wasn't I", Miroku muttered. Painful memories filled his mind. That was the time he had met Sesshoumaru.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Inuyasha suddenly spoke. Miroku looked at him surprised. He had forgotten his presence. Inuyasha looked very pale.

"I didn't want you to know. It would have ruined our friendship. Besides, you're with Kagome. I didn't want to come between you two. You are my best friend after all."

Kagome reached out to smooth his hair. Miroku was surprised. Not many fiancé would do that after hearing what she had heard. Inuyasha on the other hand went even paler.

"And besides", Miroku continued, "Would you really have wanted to know?"

Inuyasha turned to look away.

"What are you going to do now?" Kagome asked gently her hand still caressing his hair.

"I honestly don't know" Miroku whispered. His voice was about to fail him. "He must hate me."

"I'm sure he doesn't!"

"He must! Did you see his face? Oh, what have I done!?"

"You didn't do anything!" Inuyasha suddenly snapped. "It's my stupid brother you should blame! It's all his fault making you think like that. It's better that it's over now. You can forget all this ever happened and find yourself a girlfriend!"

Kagome gasped horrified. "Inuyasha!"

"What?" he snapped back. "I'm right am I? It's good that they broke up. No-one should have to deal with that bastard brother of mine. He's no good for anyone! I'm glad that he finally realized it too."

Miroku looked at Inuyasha. Was he really hearing correctly? And then he remembered what Sesshoumaru had said before he left. "Inuyasha", he said dangerously quietly, "what exactly did Sesshoumaru mean when he said 'you got what you wanted'?"

Inuyasha actually looked a bit uncomfortable under Miroku and Kagome's steely stares. "Well…I…That is to say…"

"Yes. Go on."

"Fine! I called him, okay? But this is best for you, honestly! That asshole can't care for anyone! You shouldn't be with him!"

"What did you say to him?"

"I just told him that you would eventually get tired of his cold behavior, and that you deserved better."

"What else?"

"Nothing much…" Inuyasha tried to avoid their steady stares.

"Inuyasha", Kagome's voice was warning.

Inuyasha sighed. "I may have also told him something about Miroku rather choosing me over him."

"And why would you say something like that?"

"I just tried to make him see why he should leave you alone! If I were to say that you have to choose either him or our relationship, you would definitely choose me!"

Miroku was very quiet for a moment. When he spoke his voice was serious and very clear. "Perhaps I would have, Inuyasha. But now I'm not so sure anymore. Why can't you get this into your thick head Inuyasha: I will not find a girlfriend! I'm GAY!"

Inuyasha flinched.

"And as for me and your brother; it's none of your god damn business! Sesshoumaru is a great person, and I love him. You hear me? I LOVE him! You have no right to try breaking us up!"

"But you did break up, didn't you?" Inuyasha shouted.

"Because of you!"

"You wouldn't have if you were meant to be together!"

And then Miroku did something he never thought he would do in his entire lifetime. He got up, ran to Inuyasha and punched him to the face so hard Inuyasha fell down. Then he turned around to face the surprisingly calm looking woman. "Sorry Kagome."

"If you wouldn't have done it, I would have" she said through clenched teeth.

Inuyasha groaned on the floor. "What the hell was that for?" Miroku nearly hit him again.

"YOU IDIOT!" Kagome screamed as loud as she could. Inuyasha's eyes widened. "WHAT IF HE TOLD YOU _WE_ ARE NOT MEANT TO BE TOGETHER? WHAT IF HE HAD MADE A PLAN SO WE WOULD BREAK UP? HAVE YOU ANY IDEA WHAT YOU HAVE DONE?"

She took a few deep breaths and turned her focus toward Miroku. "You just said that you love Sesshoumaru."

Miroku's hear jumped. "Yes. I think I did…"

"Then go and fix things with him. I'll take care of this stupid idiotic moron."

"Thank you Kagome."

"Go and have your happy ending."

"I'd prefer a happy beginning."

--

--

One could not say that things were going well. It had been nearly a week and Miroku had not been able to find or contact Sesshoumaru. He had left hundreds of messages, but he had answered to none of them.

Miroku had also realized how little he still knew about Sesshoumaru. Had he really been so uncaring? It must have been quite hard for Sesshoumaru. Miroku truly felt horrible about it. He still did not know exactly where Sesshoumaru worked, nor where he lived. Sesshoumaru had always come to his place and Miroku had not even bothered to ask if that was okay for him.

Now that he really thought about it, what reason did Sesshoumaru have to believe that Miroku cared about him? Nothing really. Miroku had never told him how he felt. They had slept together so many times Miroku had lost account but that did not necessarily mean he had some special feelings. But surely Sesshoumaru must have known…

Well, it was no use think of what could or should have been. It was more important to find him now so they could talk things over and get back together. Miroku did not even want to think about the option that Sesshoumaru did not want him anymore. It was much too horrible thing to think about.

Inuyasha had not changed much. Apparently Kagome had given him a very stern lecture, but Inuyasha was and always would be an idiot. Miroku was till so mad at him that he could not believe he had actually been in love with him. He doubted Inuyasha could ever truly feel sorry for what he had done. But on the other hand, Miroku could not only blame Inuyasha. It was his fault too after all. He should not have given Sesshoumaru a reason to think so badly of him.

Miroku had not talked with Inuyasha since that day. Inuyasha had called, but Miroku simply could not have anything to do with him yet. It was hard for him to know that his best friend, the person who was so very important to him, could not accept him as he was. Miroku was not sure if it was hard for him because of Miroku's relationship with his brother, or if his problem was simply with the fact that his best friend turned out to be gay. Perhaps it was both.

Suddenly Miroku's phone rang and once again he ran to it hoping _he_ would finally call. But it was not him and Miroku felt like his insides were crushed and there was an empty void in his heart. The caller was Kagome.

"Hi Kagome. What's up?"

"Oh my… You sound awful. You still haven't heard of him."

"No. Nothing. I can't believe what an idiot I have been!"

"Well, I have good news."

"Anything would be good news now."

"Then you are going to be thrilled to hear this. I know where he works."

"Really?" Miroku only barely controlled his excitement.

"Yeah. I sort of squeezed it out from Inuyasha."

"How?"

"You really don't wanna know." Miroku could almost hear the evil smirk on Kagome's face. "Anyway, you know the big computer company in that huge glass building? What's its name again?"

"I know what you mean. Name doesn't matter! Is he there?"

"Yes. He works there as a lawyer. You can probably find out where his office is from the lounge."

"Well, at least I know the building…"

"But Miroku, couldn't you have figured this out on your own? Don't get me wrong, I love to help you, but I heard that he is quite well known around the city. I'm sure many could have told you the same I did."

Miroku flinched. Kagome had seen right through him. "I know. To be honest, I'm a bit scared to see him. What if he doesn't want me anymore?

"Stop that, Miroku! You have to go to see him!"

"I know, I know! But he has not returned my calls so he really might not want to see me."

"It must be painful."

"It is."

"I meant for him."

"Oh."

"Well think about it! He's the one thinking he lost his lover because he is still in love with someone else. Do I need to add 'his brother' into this?"

"Somehow it feels very weird hearing you say that… "

"Well that's your problem. Now go to see him. And don't you dare to forget to tell me how it turned out!"

"Don't worry Kagome. If it does not go well you find me crying in front of your door before midnight."

--

--

Miroku stood in front of the huge building shivering slightly. He was scared to go in. What if Sesshoumaru would not want to see him? There was no way he could handle that. Just the idea made him feel nauseous.

After some time of pacing in front of the building he finally decided to be a man and get the whole thing over with. Actually that was a very bad choice of words since he really did not want it to be over with. That's why he was there. And now he was not making any sense even to himself…

The nice lady behind the desk was able to tell him where he could find Sesshoumaru, so after another 15 minutes of pacing he managed to go inside an elevator. Finally he was almost there and every step he took made his heart race more and more and his hands sweat and tremble. He could not believe what a pathetic creature he had become.

Miroku saw the door of Sesshoumaru's office and gulped. Then he saw a lady sitting behind a desk right next to the door. Perhaps it would be wisest to talk to the lady first. Unfortunately he was _still_ rather nervous when he opened his mouth to talk.

"Umm… ISesshylookhereis?" he blurted out. He wanted to hit his head to the wall very badly.

The lady behind the desk was quite a beauty and she was apparently quite used to these sorts of situations. "Oh my! Don't worry. You are good looking. I'm just finished. We can go and have drinks after that." She winked.

Miroku stared at her stunned. The lady took it the wrong way. "Oh! You poor thing thought I would turn you down! But you should not have! I always agree to go out with cuties like you!"

"But I'm gay!"

"Huh? I'm not a man. Obviously."

"Yes. I can see that."

"Then what are you doing here?"

"I'm not asking you out!"

"I got that already. Damn it. And you are so cute too…"

Miroku blinked. "I'm just…looking for…I mean…"

"Aaa! I get it! You want my boss!" she look pleased with herself for figuring that out and then disappointed that her boss had gotten one of her possible admirers.

"Is he here?" Miroku was starting to get anxious.

"No he is not."

"Where is he? I need to see him!"

"So does half of the population", she muttered rolling her eyes. The she smiled. "Listen, sweetheart, you should probably know that he does not meet any of his fans."

"No no, that's not it. I – "

She did not listen. "I've always thought he is meant to be with only one person. He is the type to do that. He has never even tried anything with me, his secretary! Silly man… Anyway, sorry but he's really not here. Besides, he is recovering from a VERY bad breakup. Some woman broke his heart gooood. I've never seen him like that. He was all quiet. Well, he's always quiet but not like this. And then he had to leave for Canada because of the business trip and he was out of it all the time. We just got back and there would be tons of things to do but he just left to have a drink and left me sitting here and - . Hey, honey? You okay?"

Miroku was now seriously trembling. If the babbling secretary was speaking the truth, Sesshoumaru was not doing any better that he was, which must mean that he might consider getting back together!

"Yes, yes, I'm fine. Where did you say he went to have a drink?"

"I didn't say."

"Well would you?"

"I don't really know. He has never told me, but I know that he _always_ goes to the same place. He is not likely to change his habits too easily."

Then Miroku realized. Why had he not thought of it sooner? He must be at the same place they had had a drink after meeting that second time. (When they had slept together afterwards. Oh, the happy memories.)

Without saying another word he ran out of the building and went to the club/bar he had been once before. Before stepping in he took a deep breath trying to ready himself for what was about to come. Suddenly he realized he had spent a lot of time in front of random doors lately. And why the hell did he think about something like that in a moment like this? Shaking his head violently he stepped into the classy bar.

He noticed Sesshoumaru immediately. He was sitting at the bar table. His silvery hair shone in the dim light. Considering how terribly nervous Miroku had been the entire day, he was surprised when a sudden calmness hit him. His head cooled down and somehow everything else but Sesshoumaru disappeared from his mind.

He walked toward him.

He wanted to touch him.

He wanted to make sure he was real, that he was really there.

After what seemed like hours he finally reached Sesshoumaru, and put his hand on his shoulder. He could feel his surprised flinch. Sesshoumaru turned his head to look at the rude intruder, but was met with pair of lips on his own.

Miroku could not help but to kiss him. He had longed to do that for too long already. It was neither a long nor a deep kiss, but at least he got to taste those lips he so adored.

"What are you doing?" Sesshoumaru's deep voice asked. Miroku opened his eyes and looked into the golden pools.

"I missed you", he whispered.

Sesshoumaru did not answer. He just studied Miroku's face with an unreadable expression on his face.

"You haven't retuned my calls."

"I haven't been home."

"Why did you give a number that cannot reach you while you're working?"

"Because I can't get any work done if I think about you", Sesshoumaru answered quietly. Then he turned around and did not look Miroku anymore. "What are you doing here?"

Miroku thought he heard a tinge of hurt in his voice. It made him feel very sad. "You look awful."

"Thank you."

"No, that's not what I meant."

"Then would you please say what you mean and leave. I can't stand you being here."

Miroku's chest hurt. "I came to tell you that I love you."

Sesshoumaru turned to look at him again. "What?"

"I love you", Miroku breathed out. He truly meant it. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner and I'm sorry I made you go through such horrible things but believe me, you are NOT anyone's replacement. I want only you."

Sesshoumaru's face did not show any signs of what he was thinking. His face rarely showed anything at all (except that he was sexy). Miroku was starting to get nervous again until Sesshoumaru finally said, "Took you long enough." His voice was like velvet and Miroku knew what feelings that voice held.

Miroku wrapped his hands around Sesshoumaru's neck and hugged him so tightly Sesshoumaru had a hard time trying to breath. "I must be a fool though", he sighed.

Miroku looked up. "Don't say that. You have to believe me. I love you."

Sesshoumaru gave him a weak smile. Miroku on the other hand had a ridiculously huge grin across his face after seeing Sesshoumaru smile. It was so rare to see him do that.

Miroku buried his face to Sesshoumaru's neck and breathed in his scent. He really did like that scent.

"Please don't tell me you are getting hungry" Sesshoumaru nearly groaned.

"If you even as much as mention something about beef I'm going to bite you!" Miroku said his lips against Sesshoumaru's skin.

"I didn't say anything."

"Good!"

"Now would you please stop doing that. I'm getting all kinds of ideas…"

"Oh really?" Miroku said trying to sound innocent and nibbled his neck. "What kind of ideas?"

Sesshoumaru's hands slid down his body very suggestively. "Okay. I get the idea", Miroku gasped when Sesshoumaru's hands started to do something that might be illegal in some countries.

"Hey you two", the bartender called out to them. "Get a room, will ya!"

They did not get a room but they did go back to Miroku's apartment, where Sesshoumaru kept demonstrating what ideas he had in mind. He was not the only one with ideas though, Miroku wanted to pay back with all he got.

It was a very passionate night. Miroku felt like he had taken some drug. Having Sesshoumaru to touch him and kiss him, and more importantly, inside of him was something his body and soul yearned for. Miroku was sure it was the same for Sesshoumaru.

Everything was not alright; it could never be the same it once had been. They did not even want it to be like it was. They wanted to make it better. It would take some time until they would be able to feel natural around each other and Miroku knew it would take even longer time before Sesshoumaru would stop getting jealous because of Inuyasha.

All in all, it was not the most perfect relationship, nor the steadiest one, but it was perfect for them. As long as they were together. There were no such things as happy endings. There were no words made of sugar. There was a real world and the two of them were in it. Eating beef in some nice place at the riverside.

--

--

So? What do you think? Was it worth waiting? Inuyasha's a bit of an asshole in this one... And I think this isn't as funny as the previous one, but I guess it wasn't supposed to be. Tell me what you think! I need to know. Byt he way, you have to wait the next chapter of Closed up Heart a little while longer. I have problems with it. Give me your support!! *teary eyed*

Ooh! Hey, hey! GALLUP TIME!!! I've been thinking... Lately I've written Nar/Sess stories and made Sesshoumaru uke, but here he is (definitely) seme. With WHO others you think he could be the uke? I'd like to try writing that. He's so hot... Kukuku ^^

~Val~


End file.
